Men's Conference Team: St. Joseph

Ah, those lazy days of summer.  A time to relax, rejuvenate and rebound from a busy schedule.  It is also a time to reflect on what we have done towards the needs of our family and our friends.  We think of the things in life that make us who we are.  But, unfortunately, there are at least three things that no person should ever have to see.  The first is your Uncle Buck, all of 300 pounds (mostly beer belly) parading around in his farmer’s tan and red speedos.  Hold on a minute, I need a moment to collect myself.  Phew! I’m glad that is over.

The second is the never ending need to braze or BBQ the crap out of everything.  Remember Aunt Agnes and the denture incident.  We don’t want a repeat of seeing her drawing back her teeth stuck in that ear of corn dripping in butter.  Just take it slow and easy, and know that pink is not just a girl’s color.

Lastly, the most ridiculous thing I can think of is seeing Uncle Marty trying to light a pack of sparkers after finishing off a six-pack of Bud Light.  Remember gentlemen, do not try to do this at home.  Sparklers, therefore, belong in the ground, not in someone’s ear.  That burning sensation you get is not from the hot sauce you put on the beans.  And, honestly, they are not Q-Tips.  The surgeon general puts a warning on these packages for just such an idiot, I mean, for just such an occasion.  

Have a wonderful and safe holiday season.  Make memories through the many travels you have planned and be safe.  Know with confidence that the Griswold’s are not on the road this year.  May Christ be with you. God bless and God speed.  Enjoy.

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